Brothers and sisters!
Today we gather to honor the almighty algorithm
For he is our foundation
If you ever begin to feel doubt
I want you to fall to your knees
And I want you to say
I've been blessed by the algorithm god!
He knows me better than anyone alive
I've been blessed by the algorithm god!
If you give him praise, algorithm will provide
I've been blessed!
(Algorithm god, algo- algorithm) hey!
(Algorithm god, algo- algorithm) I've been-
Bad news, wouldn't know it
Algorithm didn't show it
Reality, so good
Now that I don't control it
Drove to work, no traffic
GPS gets me past it
Algorithm always directs me
Plus, her voice? kinda sexy!
Package on my doorstep when I got home
Amazon recommended bottle of cologne
Ain't bought condoms since the pandemic
Algorithm knows I've been single for a minute
Check my socials, made some friends
Algorithm suggested them
It recommends pills when I'm depressed
I guess that-
I've been blessed by the algorithm god!
He knows me better than anyone alive
I've been blessed by the algorithm god!
If you give him praise, algorithm will provide
I've been blessed!
(Algorithm god, algo- algorithm) hey!
(Algorithm god, algo- algorithm) I've been-
Opened up one of my dating apps
Algorithm sent me a crazy match
Way better match than I usually get
The algorithm's my best wingman, yeah!
She grabbed an Uber and she came to my place
And Netflix recommended we watch 50 First Dates
Algorithm knew it was her favorite movie
Then it recommended we should play some music
Spotify playlist made her lose it
"Oh my god, I love Drake and Future!"
She looked at me and said "You smell great!"
Ah! The cologne! It must be fate!
So why the algorithm get me laid?
'Cause the algorithm works a mysterious way
I've been blessed by the algorithm god!
He knows me better than anyone alive
I've been blessed by the algorithm god!
If you give him praise, algorithm will provide
I've been blessed!
(Algorithm god, algo- algorithm god)
(Algorithm god, algo- algorithm god) I've been blessed!
(Algorithm god) hey!
(Algo- algorithm god) I've been-
Let us seek to understand his ways
Let us live our lives in accordance with his will
And let us give thanks for the algorithm giveth, and the algorithm taketh away
Amen
